I have been so fortunate to have deep conversations with others in my career. So often, we talk about connection and what it means to be connected, not only in our relationships with others but also in ourselves. One of my favourite things about my job is getting to help others see the world in a new way and learning to connect to themselves on a deeper level.
It is my observation that we do not spend a lot of time in our everyday lives genuinely getting to know the insides of others and especially not getting to know the insides of ourselves. So, unfortunately, a genuine connection doesn’t happen from the outside, leaving a lot to be desired regarding relationships.
An exercise we often do in equine facilitated wellness sessions is First Impression.
The idea is to move from one herd member to the next and notice what the horses’ first impression is of you mirrored back at you. I’ll tell you the secret to speed this along – we are not meant to make a first impression that isn’t authentic to how we feel or who we are at that moment.
How often have you met someone new and wanted to leave an impression of confidence, power or a beautiful smile that makes them feel relaxed in your presence? But, unfortunately, we put on a mask that hides our discomfort, inner turmoil or true feelings.
Horses can see through the power stances, fake smiles, focused eye contact, measured and perfected stories, acceptable behaviour and emotions. They are our truth detectors and help people find insight into how they have learned to cope within relationships, make first impressions and feel accepted by peers.
Horses are a beautiful gateway to our inner truth. They mirror what we are unaware of for us to reflect on and respond accordingly to our intentions. NO judgment is involved; they just present it as it is. They hold space for us in non-judgment and complete acceptance, offering us a picture of how we are showing them we are in that present moment, teaching us about our thoughts, feelings, blocks, beliefs, body stances, and manifestations. The exercise objective and deeper awareness of this learning is the connection!
During this exercise, I often hear how it brings up feelings of discomfort. People may feel triggered by their life stories of rejection, not being interesting, valuable or good enough. However, if we allow ourselves to be fully who we are, how we feel, what our experiences have made us and stand in front of a horse for First Impressions, this is a signal of present moment awareness.
Horses can help people develop self-confidence, self-acceptance and an increased ability to step out of their comfort zone.
But you have to permit yourself to show up authentically.
To be authentic, being present and mindful of what you are doing is crucial. Horses are not worried about yesterday or tomorrow. They are focused on the moment. Horses can teach you to be the best version of yourself. But, you have to be willing to learn and listen.
